Marriage Conference2021-05-06T13:27:34-04:00

A Job Well Done – August 9, 2021

Hi, this is pastor Ken and this is my Monday Marriage Message…A Job Well Done

Genesis 2:7,21-25 And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and the man became a living being… And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

Genesis chapter one, which we have touched on for the past several weeks, gives us the summation of the creation week. Chapter two tells us about the plan for a day of rest to be spent with the human beings He had created as I spoke of last week. That second chapter goes on to expound on some of the additional details of the events of the sixth day when God created the beasts of the field and mankind. Verse 7 tells us about the creation of Adam, how he was formed from the dust of the earth. Interestingly, Adam was created from God’s previous creation. This biblical truth is a known scientific fact today, though it was written about in the Old Testament scriptures millennia before we possessed the capability to measure the authenticity of it. According to Wikipedia; Almost 99% of the mass of the human body is made up of six elements: oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, nitrogen, calcium, and phosphorus. Only about 0.85% is composed of another five elements: potassium, sulfur, sodium, chlorine, and magnesium. According to the same source; Soil organic matter which God used to form Adam is composed chiefly of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen and smaller quantities of sulfur and other elements. Though not vital to our conversation here, an interesting fact as to the accuracy of God’s word nonetheless. God then took this man He had formed from the soil and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and Adam became a living being. Further in verses 21 and 22 we read how Eve was created. Adam was put under anesthesia, God took from him a rib, which He used to create Eve. When Adam came out of surgery, upon His first view of Eve he made the following declaration. “She is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.” In other words, she was made from me, so we are…one in the same…one flesh.

This declaration is further elaborated on for us as Moses (the Holy Spirit’s scribe for the book of Genesis) wrote the following; Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Marriage is the mysterious, (Ephesians 5:32) or might we more accurately say, the miraculous re-creation between a man and a woman of the oneness that Adam and Eve shared from their beginning. That oneness is reserved for marriage. Though Adam and Eve did not have a wedding because they were created one flesh, we know they were considered by God to be married because His word referred to Eve as Adam’s wife in verse 25.

So comes a great truth: the task of creating an entity that would be reflective of the image and likeness of God became possible when He created mankind. The creation of mankind was not complete until there was a man and a woman (Genesis 1:27) who were one flesh.

The task of creating us in the image and likeness of God is complete when He joins a man and a woman and they become one flesh.

I am not saying that an unmarried individual cannot have attributes and characteristics that are reflective of God. What I am saying is that when God takes a man and a woman and joins them in marriage miraculously making them one flesh, that one flesh has an exponentially greater capacity to be reflective of the image and likeness of God.

Questions to Answer:

  1. With what level of assuredness do you see yourselves as one flesh?
  2. What does it mean to you that Jesus says you are one flesh?
  3. How have your thoughts on this been altered or augmented since you started listening to this podcast?
  4. Are social media and electronic devices creating any obstacles for the oneness in your marriage?

Actions to Take:

  1. Discuss what you think your marriage would look like if you focused as a couple on always protecting the oneness God has created of the two of you.
  2. Pray that God would remind you of ways to protect the oneness and ask the Holy Spirit to put a check in your spirits about anything you need to remove from your lives that hurts your oneness.

So now, determining to walk in the oneness God has gifted you in your marriage with, and to never stop learning how to foster it…Go Be Awesome!

It Was Very Good – August 30, 2021

Hi, this is pastor Ken, and this is my Monday marriage message…It Was Very Good

Genesis 1:31 Then God saw everything that He had made, indeed it was very good. So the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

You might rightly ask yourself, what on earth this verse has to do with marriage. Stick with me until the end and in fact into next week’s podcast, and I promise it will become abundantly evident why this verse is so important to you and your marriage. One of my favorite sayings is “Today is a good day to have a good day”. In fact, that quote hangs on a sign in our home just above the front door so that I can be reminded of it each day before I leave the house. Sometimes I need that reminder more than others. It is true though…today is a good day to have a good day! Did you know that God has good days too? You might ask, For God, isn’t every day a good day? The answer to that is no. How can that be? If God is good and loving, and in fact perfect (and He is) how can He have a bad day? Notice I did not say He has bad days…I only said some days are not good days in God’s view. We know this to be true from scripture…the scripture above to be exact.

Genesis 1:4 tells us that God viewed the first day of creation as a good day. Genesis 1:10 says that God saw what took place on the second day of creation as a good day. Genesis 1:12 tells us that God found the third day of creation to be a good day. Genesis 1:17 tells us that as God looked over all He had created on the fourth day that He saw it as a good day. Genesis 1:21 says that God viewed what He had created on the fifth day of creation as a good day. The sixth day was the day God created man and woman. Genesis 1:31 as quoted above tells us that God saw the sixth day of His creation and His response was that it was a very good day! In fact, verse 25 speaks to the fact that also on the sixth day God created the beasts of the earth. After doing so it says that He saw that it was good, but after He created Adam and Eve…about that…He said it was very good. God’s view of the day that He created the beings He desired to have relationship with got ‘kicked up a notch’ upon their arrival.

It is kind of reminiscent of what we do when we know there is a new baby coming. We prepare everything we can. We buy the items we will need to feed and clothe and care for the new baby when it arrives. We even find excitement in outlaying the money that we might not otherwise be so happy to part with. The days that we spend doing so are good days. We prepare the room in our home where the baby will sleep. We even give it a special name…the nursery. We paint and decorate, put together overpriced and under-crafted furniture, special for the baby’s needs. We hang the mobile with love and care, all in anticipation that the baby will soon arrive. It’s hard work, it takes time we would normally say we don’t have…but those are still good days. Then comes the day everyone has been waiting for. Mom says it’s time to go, so it’s off to the hospital for the coming arrival of the new family member. When the baby is finally here, even though it has been exhausting…especially for mom…when you are able to hold that tiny, warm…incredibly loud for its size, baby…it is a very good day! Why? Because the one you will spend the rest of your life enjoying relationship with is finally on scene!

I think God probably experienced some of those same emotions and feelings when all of the preparations of the previous five days were completed. I think when God was finally ready to create Adam and Eve, no matter how much energy had to go into getting ready for their arrival, it was a very good day! The Bible tells us in the beginning of the next chapter that on the seventh day God rested. When we rest after completing a large task, we often want to be alone…maybe take a nap, but not God. It is clear from His word and the requirements He put in place for that day of rest that His intention was to spend it with us! Have you ever considered that we, as His special, very good, creation are so important to God that the day after He created mankind, He took the next one off from the incredibly important work He had been doing just so He could spend it with His people!

Questions to Answer:

  1. What do you think made the sixth day a very good day for God over the previous five days?
  2. Do you see God as someone who has such a desire for human beings as I have described?
  3. Do you think He has individual feelings toward you?

Actions to Take:

  1. Continue praying for your marriage and for your spouse.
  2. Read Psalm 139 together and talk about what it says about how fondly God thinks toward the two of you.

So now, relishing in the fact that as far as God is concerned, the day you arrived was a very good

day…Go be Awesome!

Hi, this is pastor Ken and this is my Monday Marriage Message…It Takes Two

This week we are going to continue to extract truths from the same base scripture we have been looking at for the past several weeks. Just to refresh our memories allow me to read it to you again.

Genesis 1:26,27 reads; Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

In the past two weeks we have considered two different truths from this scripture. Truth #1 – The oneness of the Trinity is the standard for the oneness given to us in our marriages. Truth #2 – God created marriage as the way that we can more fully reflect His holiness. This week I want to examine a third truth – God had to create both a man and a woman to have something capable of reflecting His many characteristics.

As we noted last week, there is more to God than we will ever know. His word does allude to many of His characteristics. Some of those qualities are more readily found in man than they are in woman. Some of those qualities are present in the female but not in the male. Normally we see God as male because He is almost always referred to in His word with male pronouns. But there are many attributes of God that we find only exhibited in women. In fact, one of the names for God, El Shaddai, that we have translated to mean Almighty God who provides, may be a bit of a misnomer. Scofield’s reference notes states; The qualifying word Shaddai is formed from the Hebrew word “shad,” the breast, invariably used in Scripture for a woman’s breast. This means that the name El Shaddai actually means the almighty breasted one who makes provision. The one who provides what we need as a mother provides nourishment for her child. The point here isn’t if God is more male or more female, Jesus said He is Spirit. The point is that He is so great, so all encompassing, that neither man nor woman of their own accord, not even if they were perfect, would be capable of reflecting all of His attributes. God created both male and female so together they might be more capable of comprehensively reflecting who He is and what His capabilities are.

One of the easiest ways to see this is with the capability to create life. God can create life all on His own. In fact, that is what we have been considering for the past three weeks. Can man create life all on his own? Of course not. Can woman create life all on her own? The answer again is no. Though women do the bulk of the work when it comes to bringing new life into the world, (and ladies we as men are incredibly grateful for that). Women are still unable to create life independent of a man. However, when a man and a woman are both present, are they capable of creating life as God can? Yes!

Interestingly, most men and women do not balk at the differences they possess that allow them to create life. Most of the time, in fact, they celebrate those differences. I am unashamedly happy that my wife’s body is different than mine! I think she, too, enjoys the fact that I am different than she is, physically speaking. About the only time I might wish she were built like I am is when we are trying to move something that is too heavy for the muscle structure God created her to have. Other than those few and far between occurrences, we celebrate the fact that we have been created so differently.

While we appreciate the physical differences we have apart from our spouse, the differences do not end there, but often our appreciation does.  As I said, God has many, many characteristics that as men and women we reflect. Some are able to be reflected in both genders, some are individually specific to one gender or the other. When we begin to lack appreciation for those qualities we do not personally possess, trouble begins to arise. We will look further into some of the differences we have as men and women that are individually reflective of our creator in the podcasts to come. For the purposes of this edition it is important only that we recognize that God created both male and female, and that the purpose for that goes much farther than procreation alone. Though that ability does allow for our reflection of one of God’s attributes, it is but one.

Questions to Answer:

  1. What other attributes of God do you think we are to reflect that might be gender specific?
  2. If your spouse has an attribute that reflects one of God’s, but you don’t possess or even understand the importance of it, are they right or wrong to display it?
  3. If you are truly “one flesh” as Jesus spoke of in Matthew chapter 19, and your spouse displays an attribute of God’s that you do not possess…are you also then endowed with that attribute?

Actions to Take:

  1. Try to find evidence of your answers to the first question above in God’s word.
  2. Celebrate the physical differences – tell your spouse what physical differences the two of you have that you particularly appreciate and why.
  3. Thank God for the differences that you and your spouse possess and ask Him to help you appreciate the ones you may not even be aware of yet.
  4. Begin praying daily – in other words for the rest of your life, for your marriage. Pray that it will be all that God wants it to be. Pray that you will be open to anything God wants to teach you about your marriage that you may not have already known. Pray that your spouse will be blessed by you as you try your best to reflect the characteristics of God that He has created you to display.

So now, looking forward to finding the blessing in all of your differences…Go Be Awesome!

Mirror Mirror on the Wall who is the Most Holy of Them All – August 16, 2021

Hi this is pastor Ken and this is my Monday Marriage Message…Mirror, Mirror on the Wall Who is the Most Holy of Them All

Genesis 1:26,27 reads; Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

Last week I spoke about the truth that God wants us to experience a oneness in our marriages that is much like the oneness shared within the Trinity. I spoke of the imperative existence of oneness in our marriages, and the fact that it isn’t simply a desirable augmentation when possible, but rather a position that God intends all marriages to operate from. Today I want to speak with you about the Second truth I want to glean from this scripture – “In our image and in our likeness.” The intent of God was to create of every marriage an entity that reflected Him in all of its ways. His desire was that people would recognize that likeness is exclusive to the rest of creation, and was purposed so they could commune together in perfect harmony. God has many qualities and characteristics that He desires to see reflected in mankind so that both…might fully recognize the special nature of the relationship of man to God and God to man.

The stated intent of creating mankind is that mankind reflect the creator. I will draw your attention in the coming weeks to the fact that marriage is an integral part of the creation account. As such, the marriage of a man to a woman is intended to further the understanding and capability to accurately reflect God. It is most important that we understand we are created to reflect God in both His image and His likeness. This alone is enough to keep theologians busy for their professional careers trying to fully understand it and convey to us its truths. Obviously then, I will only brush the surface of its meaning and will do so in the simplest of terms.

God is many things…countless are His attributes. In our fallen state we cannot begin to know who He is and how He operates in His entirety. God’s word tells us in Isiah 55:9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts. Therefore, we are wisest to admit that we cannot know even a fraction of what we are created to reflect, yet we would be foolish to allow that to make us believe ourselves unable to do what we were created to do. In other words, though we will be finding out the depth of God’s character and attributes for all eternity, we are responsible to begin emulating each one of them as they become known to us.

What we can know is the nature of God…that He is Holy. His holiness has some defining parameters. Holiness will not allow for sinful action. In fact, the opposite of any sin you can name is holiness. The opposite of a liar is not an honest person, it is holiness. The opposite of a thief is not a preserver, it is holiness. The opposite of a cheater is not a faithful person it is holiness. Therefore, we can know that we are to reflect only those things which are holy. God’s word says as much in 1 Peter 1:15,16 But as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written, “Be holy, for I am holy.” It is interesting to note that this scripture is not the overbearing, impossible command that it is sometimes mistaken for. Rather the connotation is actually that of God attempting to draw us into becoming like Him in order that we might be in right relationship with Him, just as a man might attempt to woo the object of his affection. From this we can extract two things. First that we are called to ensure that our actions do not violate the holiness we are to reflect. Sinful actions never reflect the image and likeness of God. Second, holiness is possible. God does not give us instructions we cannot practice. Notice I did not say perfect. In this life we are being perfected so that in the next we can be presented to Christ as a perfect bride without spot or blemish. (Ephesians 5:27) We must practice reflecting God’s holiness both as individuals and as a part of our marriages if we are to fulfill His purpose for our creation.

Questions to Answer:

  1. Do you agree that the creator gets to determine the purpose of the created?
  2. How do you each think you do at recognizing the necessity to be reflective of God in your everyday lives?
  3. How can you be reminded that your words and actions must reflect the nature of God?

Actions to Take:

  1. Tell your spouse one area you see where you feel they do a good job of reflecting God.
  2. Thank your spouse for being willing to allow God to take control of their life in that area.
  3. Pray that God will help you see the areas He wants you to reflect Him better.

So now, determining to reflect God in every way possible, go be awesome!

It Takes 3 to make 2 become One

It Takes 3 to make 2 become One is a new and exciting marriage conference. This seminar operates from the position that your marriage is created by God, blessed by God and is an inheritance from God.

It Takes 3 to make 2 become One is not theory…it is theology!

This conference will answer the following questions and more:

  • Why did God create the institution of marriage?
  • What does God’s word have to say about my marriage?
  • What is God trying to accomplish through my marriage?
  • Does God see my marriage as valid?
  • Can my spouse and I have a biblically sound marriage according to God’s design?
  • What are my responsibilities before God as a married person?

This conference will teach you practical ways to:

  • Appreciate your spouse more.
  • Understand your spouse better.
  • Improve your communication with your spouse.
  • Resolve differences in a godly way.
  • Work together as a couple to accomplish mutual goals.
  • Co-parent in a low stress environment.
  • Meet your spouse’s needs all while seeing your own needs met better than they ever have been before.
  • Learn to be on the same page with your spouse.

We are excited to offer this seminar at Crossroad Community Church because we see the needs that all married people have. We know from our own experience that good godly marriage is not always easy. Like anything else of value, it takes work to make it work. We are excited to offer this conference where you will learn how to do the work that it takes…and how to do that work most efficiently. This is not going to be a conference where you were helped to feel good about your marriage for a day but not sure how to keep that going tomorrow. We will be offering life-lasting, time-tested, biblically-based practical ways to continue to see growth in your marriage for the rest of your lives.

This conference will be held right here at Crossroad Community Church July 23rd and 24th. We will begin Friday evening promptly at 6:30 pm and will be finished at 8pm. We will begin again on Saturday morning at 8:30 am and will complete the seminar at 2 pm. A boxed lunch will be provided for all participants. We truly hope you will choose to join us for this exciting time! We know it will be a blessing to your marriage.

Cost of event $20; no childcare available

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